Am I doing this right?
by BrittanaHeyaEndgame
Summary: Santana has had a crush on Brittany for 2 years. Is she doing the right thing to get close to her? Is it really so easy to get over a crush you've had for 2 years?
1. Chapter 1

**A / N Hey guys! This is my first fanfic so i hope you like it. It's very close to my heart and just remember, Brittana is always endgame. And just to warn y'all, english is not my first language so sorry for the mistakes if there are any. **

* * *

When will Mr. Schue stop talking, I don't even know what he's saying. Maybe I should try to listen.

"So just because he felt confident this day he finally said hi to this girl he likes, and they ended up going out, after a couple of months they got engaged. What i'm trying to say is that one simple decision can really change your life." First time he's saying something good, that's weird... "If there's anything you're afraid to do, just do it. The worst thing that can happen is that it doesn't turn out the way you want it to."

* * *

1 month earlier..

_Omg, she's so beautiful! I wonder if she knows that I exist. C'mon Santana, you've been creeping on her for almost two years now. Okay I need to talk to her. What should I say? 'Hi. i'm Santana Lopez and i've had a crush on you since the first day i saw you.' Nope, I can't do this. I should ask Q for some advice._

_As usually me and Quinn walk home together, and today was a usual day_

_"Hey Q, how was your day? You look pissed."_

_The blonds face was a dark shade of red, oh no this isn't good._

_"Puck fucking cheated on me with that new bitch!" Quinn's jaw clenched._

_"Oh, Bre? Okay we have some face to smash. And i'll kill Puckerman with my bare hands."_

_"No San, fuck that, this was his last chance and he fucked up. I'm done." She said while running her hands through her hair._

_I embraced her and gave a peak on the cheek "Yeah, fuck him! You deserve someone much better." She held my arm as we started to walk home._

_"Or I could just join your team and get myself a hot blonde, with bright blue eyes." she said chuckling at how she made me blush at the mention of the blonde. "Maybe if you helped me I could be the one that gets the blonde with bright blue eyes, but i've always had a feeling that you're into this." I said pointing my finger below my stomach._

_"Yeah, totally!" Both of us started to laugh. _

_"So what can I help you with Miss. Lopez?"_

_"As you know, am unable to talk to Brittany and i really want to get in touch with her somehow, get to know her. The Brittany S. Pierce herself, not some douche she slept with so I need some ideas of how to do that."_

_"That's it?" I nodded _

_" Well you could talk to one of her friends first, that wouldn't be intimidating would it?_

* * *

Today was the day i was going to talk to her friend, I haven't been able to because I was too afraid but today I have to and especially after what Schue was saying. After Quinn told me to talk to Brittany's friend first i checked the yearbook for her name. Rachel Berry, a short jewish girl that loved to sing, she was pretty but not as much as Brittany.

I saw Brittany coming down the hallway with her three other friends, including Berry. This was it. I have do this.

"Hey, excuse me" I said walking towards the petite brunette

"Hello?" She looked stunned. Omg stupid, stupid, stupid i don't even know what to say.

"I just wanted to tell you that you really look like someone I know." I realized that Brittany and the others already walked away.

"Oh, I do? Who is this person?" She said smiling.

"It's my friend's friend, we met at a party and you look like her so much!"

"Maybe you could show me a picture?" Still wearing that smile on her face.

There was no friend's friend. What the fuck am I supposed to do? Tell her I was joking? No I can't do that.

"I don't know her Instagram but I'll ask my friend and show you tomorrow? You should get going your friends are gone so go to them. Bye!" I left without listening to what she said, probably just bye. Okay now i need to find someone that looks like her.

I searched brunette on Instagram until i found someone that could pass for Rachel's older sister.

The next day I was on my way to class when I saw her sitting by herself. I walked up to her and brought my phone out.

"Look here she is, she looks like you so much!"

"I think you need glasses, we don't look alike." Her nose was scrunched as she looked at my phone.

"Yeah you do! She could be your sister or something like that.."

"Well no we don't look alike, and I have to go so bye" That was cold.

"Um hey, what's your name?" I couldn't tell her that I looked her up and that I already knew it. She stopped and walked back to me.

"Rachel, Rachel Barbra Berry." She flipped her hair in my face and walked away, leaving me stunned.

"I'M SANTANA BY THE WAY!" I shouted behind her. She turned "I know!"

I see Rachel everyday of course we go to the same school but we just smile at each other, well I smile because of the blonde right next to her. Am I using Rachel? Well, I don't really know.

* * *

Quinn and the others made me join the school's soccer team for girls and we had our first practice today. This would be fun, no not really. There was already some sophmore girls there when we arrived to the field. I saw Rachel, didn't know she was into soccer but my eyes searched for the bright blue ones and I found them.

Brittany was looking right at me. She was wearing a t-shirt and shorts that showed her never ending toned legs. Stop staring idiot! I started to change my shoes, I saw Rachel and Brittany go up to a girl from my year, that they apparently knew. They talked really quietly so I couldn't hear what they were saying but after the girl they talked to, I think her name was Andrea, came to me and asked me why the blonde and brunette were stressed out because of me. Okay now i'm confused, why are they stressed out because of me? I'm the one that's supposed to freak-out, i'm fucking playing soccer with Brittany and omg I can't mess this up. I glanced behind and saw Rachel and Brittany looking at me while talking, I smiled at them and started to do warm ups.

Wait, everything clicked. They didn't want to be here because of me, they know about my crush on Brittany. Fuck, i'm screwed. They probably think i'm a creep and hate me.

I found Quinn talking to the coach.

"Q, I really need to talk to you!"

"Why, what happened San?" she said with a concerned look on her face.

"She knows, B - brittany knows about e-ev-erything, I'm fucked."

"Oh fuck Santana, how?" she asked while hugging me tight.

Before I could say something the coach blew in his whistle and everyone gathered around him.

"Only one week till our first game, so I need all of you to do better than best during practice. We should not lose this. Me and David will look at you while you're playing to final your positions. Is that clear?" Everyone nodded. "Good, David will divide you into two teams and do what you're told to." Everyone got lined up and David started to divide the girls. I went to speak with coach.

"Hey coach, I needed to ask something." I said meeting his eyes.

"What you want Lopez?

"Can I quit after our first game? I need to focus on my studies more so I…"

"Yeah, sure" He said, not letting me finish.

Well that was easier than I thought. I went back and practiced with the other girls, avoiding Brittany as much as I could and having small with Rachel every now and then.

We had two more practices and then on Monday we will have our first match. The other two practices went pretty much the same, me avoiding her blue eyes and having small talk with Rachel except Brittany tackled me while taking the ball from me. I want to think it was a mistake but my brain tells me otherwise.

The match started at 10am, as soon as we got there we went to change into our gear. Brittany was facing the wall while she was undressing, she couldn't see if anyone was watching her from behind. She lifted her shirt with both her hands on each side making her slim back tighten. She had a birthmark that kind of looked like heart. Brittany started taking off her jeans and revealed her toned legs, they were half way down when she turned and looked straight at me. It felt like we were the only ones in her but there 14 other girls changing and making a lot of noise. She sat down and broke our eye contact. That was the time I realized that I was staring at her back and some of the girls must have noticed it. I quickly started to change and went outside to wait for the others.

We started to warm up. Me, Brittany and two other chicks got the same position. Our job was to protect our goal and goalkeeper. I knew I had to communicate with Brittany if we wanted to win.

The first half didn't go well for us, the score was 1 - 2, they scored 2 goals right after eachother. The second half we scored 2 goals and they none. We won our first fucking game! Everyone hugged and cheered, and we went out to celebrate our first win.

All of us didn't fit on one table so the sophomores sat behind us. We all ordered and talked about the match, when we were finished some of us went home and the ones who stayed went to a café. Brittany left alone, her mom called and she rushed out.

After a while Quinn needed to be somewhere and I was going home.

"Bye everyone! See you tomorrow!" Quinn said while both of us waved to them.

"Bye!"

"Wait, you're taking the train right?"

We turned around and saw the source of the voice, even though it's not hard figure that out.

"Yeah Rachel, you wanna come with us?"

"Yes, Quinn I would love to but only if you don't mind" She said looking at me like she was asking for permission.

"No we don't mind, c'mon let's roll"

Q got a phonecall from Puck, they were arguing about something so Quinn was walking ahead of us.

"You know, we keep smiling at eachother and i've always wanted to come up to you and talk but there's always something in the way." She said looking at the ground.

"Really? That's weird, i've been thinking about it too, but you know I didn't really know what to say," Why am I telling her this?

"Well we have a great chance right now," She said turning her head towards me.

We talked about pretty much everything, Quinn was meeting Puck somewhere so she left us. Our station came and we got off the train. Rachel has to take the bus from here and I walk home. But that didn't happen.

"Aren't you going to take that bus?" I asked.

"No, I'll walk you home"

"Why? no, I mean you don't have to" I was surprised.

"I want to"

"Oh, okay" Why is she walking me home? This is so weird.

We started to walk to my house, it was a 10 minute walk. When we arrived I invited Rachel in and we went up to my room. It felt a little weird but I couldn't do much about it. We were still talking about random stuff but then she asked something I knew she would.

"Whenever me and Britt walk into the same room as you, I've noticed that Quinn and some other of your friends looks at us as if there was something wrong. Is it because of me or Britt? I need to clear that up." She said, looking at me like she knew that i was hiding something

* * *

**Cliffhanger! Well there's a lot more to come so give some feedback. Was this okay? If you're reading this I love you! Have a nice day! **


	2. Chapter 2

**A / N: Hey guys! just wanted to tell you all this is a real story, I've changed some details but the story is the same. There is a Rachel and Brittany in my life. After a few chapters I'll write from my imagination but for now you're reading a very important part of my life. Sorry for any mistakes! I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

* * *

_Yes, I've told some of friends about Brittany. But how am I supposed to answer this?_

"I thi…" I wasn't able to form any words. Her eyes didn't leave mine.

"Okay, I guess it's something important, you don't have to say anything" She saw how uneasy I became.

"No, no Rachel, I want to tell you but I don't know if it's right. Please, just give me a minute." I said finding my floor the most interesting thing.

"Okay, mind if I look?" She said pointing at the pictures on my shelf.

"Nope" I smiled at her. Okay I should just tell her. I opened my door and walked around to see if anyone was there. All was it. I came back in and sat on my stool.

"I'm gay." I looked up to see her reaction but she just smiled.

"I'm bisexual." I was not expecting that.

"You are?" I had to make sure.

"Yes Santana, I feel attraction to both men and women" She said smiling. Okay, this was so weird. We've known each other for barely 10 hours and we are sharing some serious things.

We talked about who we are out to and when we realized it and things like that. I thought she forgot her second question but I was wrong.

"You still haven't answered, was it because me or Brittany?" She said not showing any emotions at all. I knew she had figured out that I like one of them. This question was not just about why my friends looked at them or who they looked at, it was about who I liked. The one I laid my eyes on for the first time and couldn't stop thinking about her. Rachel deserves the truth.

"Brittany. I've had this thing for her the first time I saw her walking down the hallway. She took my breath away." She smiled at me but it wasn't the smile she had before, it was a sad smile. And it broke my heart seeing her sad. "Please say something"

"You want me to say something," She let out a sigh. "Santana you wanted to use me to get close to Brittany and you're asking me say something. I feel like crap and i'm really sad right now." She managed to say with a sad smile.

I'm a terrible person, Rachel was starting to like me more than a friend and I was using her.

"I'm so sorry Rachel, if I knew this would have happened I'd never speak to you in the first place. I'll do anything to make it up for you, I swear." A tear falling from my cheek.

"Don't Santana." Her smile was gone now.

Silence fell over the room, she was the one to break it.

"You know, i'm not angry at anybody. It's just that this has happened several times before, whenever people come to me they make it obvious that it's for Brittany and not me. But you, I don't know, it really felt like you liked seeing me and that you were smiling because of me." Rachel looked at her hands. She looked so hurt.

"I'm sor-" She didn't let me finish

"Britt has always been the center of our group and she loves it. She used to bully me and she doesn't even remember. She's a really self-centered and cold person, do you like Macklemore? She loves him."

"Stop Rachel, you don't have to do this, you could just take your things and go and you don't ever have to talk to me again.

"I can't do that."

" Why?"

"Because I actually like you Santana." I knew she did but hearing her say it just made it feel so real.

"You deserve someone much better, i'm not good eno-"

" You're perfect Santana! I don't ever wanna hear you say that you're not good enough, because you are. " She said, taking my hands in hers and looking at me with her dark brown eyes.

"I ruined something so good before I even got it, for something i'd never get. I'm sorry." Tears running down my face.

"No San, you haven't ruined anything. I'll forgive you if you promise to hug me everytime you see me" She smiled and wiped the tears from my face. "Deal?"

I smiled back. _Rachel just gave me another chance, which means a chance for us._ "Deal."

She opened her arms and embraced me for the first time. She held me in her arms for a while, it was really comforting. We heard footsteps coming up and we broke apart.

"I think I should leave, it's getting late and you probably have stuff to do"

"Yeah okay, i'll walk you to, the station" I handed her her jacket.

"It's fine, i'll walk home"

"Then I'll walk with you." Her eyes were locked with mine, she didn't move. "Please, let me do this for you"

"Okay fine, I'll take the bus and you can walk with me to the station." Putting on her jacket while smiling at me.

"That's all I ask for." I smiled back at her

* * *

Next day...

Today the guys of our school were having their first match and the girls had to go support them. Keeping my promise, first thing I did as I walked into the field was to look for Rachel. I saw her standing next to Brittany, I walked up to her and hugged Rachel. I noticed Brittany taking her phone out so I left.

"My friends are waiting so i'm gonna get going, see you soon." I looked at her and then Brittany, but she wasn't looking at me, I smiled and went over to Quinn.

"What was that?" Quinn said with a suspicious look on her face.

"What was what?"

"Why were you getting all cozy with Berry?"

"Am I sensing jealousy here miss Fabray?" I joked.

"Ha-ha-ha, no. I wanna know what happened after I left, because getting that cozy after one day I wonder what'll happen after a week." She shoved her shoulder into mine, playfully.

"Oh shut up Fabray, Nothing's gonna happen after a week, we're just friends. There's something different about her, I don't know how to explain it but she has to be the kindest person i'll ever meet."

I told Quinn everything. " ...So that's why I hugged her."

" You didn't get the girl but you're taking her best friend instead. Be careful with what you're doing Lopez. " She said with a stern look.

"It's not like that Quinn, Rachel's not like that. "

"Wait, so you're over Brittany?"

"I Don't know, it's complicated."

"Don't do something you'll regret San. I'll always be here for you and tell your girl to stop staring, people will notice"

I looked over my back and saw Rachel looking at me, I gave her a small wave and turned back to Quinn.

"Yeah, i'll need to to that." Both of us started to laugh.

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**I hope you liked it! Leave a review if you did! My Rachel really is the kindest person i'll ever meet, keep on reading this story and you'll get to know why. And My Brittany really is a cold and self centered person.. tell me if i need to change anything! Bye! hope you're having a great day!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A / N: I'm so so so sorry for not posting last week, I just had a lot going on. but hers a short chapter, I promise you'll get a longer one soon. To the guest reader who was confused: This is a brittana fic. Rachel is a big part of it and you'll get it soon when i'm done. And one more thing i have tumblr you could follow me there and ask questions and all of that there, it's 'lezbination . tumblr . com' ****(remove the space)  
****sorry for any mistakes! **

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After the game, Rachel insisted on walking me home and it felt nice having company. It got dark outside when we reached my house. We said our goodbyes and Rachel walked back. I felt a need to know if she got home alright, even though i'm pretty sure Rachel can handle herself. I asked Andrea for Rachel's number and immediately texted her.  
_To Rachel:_  
Hey, it's Santana, wanted to know if got home safely. Got your number from Andrea btw.

It had been a couple of hours since i pressed the send button, but still no answer.  
I started to get worried and wondered if i should give her a call or maybe kik Brittany and ask her instead. Brittany's kik was on her instagram page so I could just kik her, but would that be right? I decided that i'd wait instead. Three hours later Rachel texted back.

_From Rachel:_  
Hello Santana. Forgive me for answering so late, I fell asleep. Yes i got home safely. I'm so happy :D

_To Rachel:_  
Nothing to ask forgiveness for Rach :) Hahah, why are so happy?

_From Rachel:_  
It's a habit :/ You have my number! :D

_To Rachel:_  
Hahah dork! See you tomorrow :)

_From Rachel:_  
Wait, do you wanna do something tomorrow after school?

_To Rachel:_  
Yeah sure, we'll talk about it in school.

What was happening? Am I getting feelings for Rachel? How is that even possible? Okay, I need to chill the fuck out.

* * *

I tried to avoid seeing Rachel during breaks but I knew that I'll see her soon. I can't hide forever. I was trying to figure my feelings out. I talked to Q and she said that maybe i'm feeling guilty for what I did and i'm giving her what she wanted, my affection. I should let everything go as it's going and wait until i'm sure.

_From Rachel:_  
Where are you? Haven't seen you all day.

Should I reply? Yes. I can't avoid her.

_To Rachel:  
_I'm in the Cafeteria w/ Quinn.

_From Rachel:_  
I'm coming. :)

"Who is that?" Quinn said trying to look at my phone but I stuck it back in my bra.  
"It's Rachel, she com- ,she's here."  
"Hey Rachel, nice to see you." Quinn was being weirdly nice.  
"Hello there Quinn, it's nice to see you to." Rachel was her sweet self. They kept looking at each other, like they were talking with their eyes. I had to break this.  
"EEEHHHEEM, I'm not feeling forgotten at all." I said getting both pairs of eyes on me.  
"I'm gonna leave you both alone, see you later San" Quinn walked away.  
When Quinn turned her back against us I hugged Rachel just as I promised to do.  
"How are you?" She asked as if she knew there was something wrong.  
"I'm fine, just a little tired." I said looking down on my hands."Any plans for today?"  
"Yeah, I thought we cou- " She hesitated. "We could what? Go on Rach." I said.  
She smiled at the mention of her name and it was like she got all her confidence back. "-Go to your place and watch a movie or something." She said unsure.  
"Yeah sure, text med when you have finished, I'll see you later" I ran my hand through my hair and patted on her shoulder.  
"Okay, see you Santana." She smiled

* * *

I waited for Rachel outside the school and i saw her coming out of the main entrance  
"Ready to go?" I asked.  
"Yes, let's go.  
We started walking. Everything feels so wrong yet so right. I actually thought that I loved Brittany but what is this? Why am I so nervous about going home with another girl to watch a movie. Rachel's a friend, right? Right. I really want to make it up to her because what I did was real bad. Maybe it wouldn't be as bad as it is if she hadn't fallen for me, but how can I blame her for not wanting me, I'm the hottest bitch in school. Well I was a bitch, now i'm just the hottest. If Rachel didn't fall for me, I could have moved on from all this. Only a week ago everything was clear, I loved Brittany and I knew i'd never get her so I didn't tell her or talk to her. The only thing I wanted was to maybe become her friend, and after graduation move on. The walk was pretty quiet and we reached my house. We went directly in to my room and closed the door.

"So you start the computer and i'll get another chair." I said walking to my brothers room to take his chair.  
"Okay, what's your password?" Rachel asked.  
"Cartheme with an capital C" I said while struggling to get passed the threshold with a chair.  
"Cartheme, really?" she smiled, I nodded.  
Everything was set, we had our movie 'world war Z', candy and everything ready. I pressed the play button. Rachel had seen it before but I hadn't so I had no idea what it was about. There's one thing only Q knows about me, scary shit scares the shit out if me. Rachel convinced me that it's not that bad so I was kind of able to watch it.  
Rachel ran her hands up and down her arms to get warm i assume.  
"You cold?" I asked  
"Yeah it's cold in here, but it's fine."  
"No it's not." I stuck my arm between her arm and body and held her hand and gently stroking her arm with my other hand. I didn't know why I did this or how it happened, it just did and it felt really right in the moment.

* * *

**told you it was short.. but hey keep me motivated so leave a review or a message on tumblr if you liked it and i'll try to update as fast as i can. Have a nice day! **


	4. Chapter 4

**A / N: I'm so sorry for making you wait so long, i've just not been able to write, and i've decided to stop writing my own story and just go with my imagination,. I hope it's good and enjoy this chapter. **

* * *

From Rachel:

I really wanted to kiss you today, but i didn't know if it was too soon. So I didn't.

Me and Rachel had something going on between us, but I didn't know what, or I wasn't sure. Spending time with her these last couple of weeks really made me think that maybe Brittany isn't the one I want. Seeing Rachel more often made me realize what a great person she is, she'll never hurt anyone. After she sent me that I thought it was time to take it to the next level.

Yes, I wanted to taste does lips on mine.

To Rachel:

Next time, go for it. ;)

From Rachel:

I miss you.. :(

To Rachel:

Miss you too Rach. See you on monday. 3

That weekend we texted pretty much non-stop. Talking to Rachel made me feel that I really meant something, something special to someone, and that feeling was wonderful. I had friends that liked me, but that was just as a friend. This feeling of actually being liked in a different way, in a way that it could turn into love at anytime, it's priceless. I think i was falling for Rachel, no one ever had given me this feeling before.

* * *

Monday morning, probably the first time I was looking forward to it. After first period Rachel texted me and told me to come upstairs where there weren't any pupils or teachers. I told quinn do wait downstairs and make some noise if there was anyone coming, just in case anything was happening. This side of the school wasn't really so big, there was only 4 classrooms and a bench in the walls were dark greenish and the floor looked like someone puked on in. And it was pretty dark up here because there weren't any windows. I went upstairs and saw her standing there with her adorable horse sweater and a off white skirt with white leggings. She was looking down on her hands, she looked tensed.

"Hey, what's up?" I asked going up to her with a concerned look. Rachel looked up at me and squeezed me between her arms.

"Nothing, I just missed you"

I smiled and we held each other for a while. This feeling of comfort and being liked for what i am it just became so big that i didn't want to lose it, ever. I knew she wanted this and my heart told me to do this. We were still holding each other and I looked at her, everything we said and did was running through me, all last week in detail. And I told myself 'yes, i want this.'

"Let's make it official," Rachel's eyes widened

"Really? You're sure?" I could see that she was trying to control the happiness on her face.

I didn't say anything, I leaned in and met her lips with mine. Our lips moved together, I felt her tongue wanting to meet mine, I opened my mouth and let her in. There was a sound downstairs and we broke apart, I heard footsteps. Rachel waited there and I went back to meet Quinn.

"Didn't you hear me?!" Quinn was not happy.

"Um.. no?"

"Well I was making all kinds of noises but you didn't hear me? What were you doing?" She gave that usual suspicious look.

I ignored her and took out my phone and typed out a message to Rachel.

Meet me after school?

From Rachel:

Absolutely :)

* * *

"Are you sure she won't suspect anything?" Rachel asked while we were walking home. She waited for me after she finished and we went home together.

"Are you always this anxious, or is this a special day? No, why would she? you're my friend, or that's what she thinks," One thing I learned about Rachel is that she either thinks a lot or she doesn't think at all.

" I hope she does. Did Quinn say anything?"

"Umm.. no, why would she?"

" I don't know, did you tell her?" She asked, annoyed.

"No, I thought we should talk about who we are going to tell." I knew that some of my friends that knew about my crush on Brittany would just think that I didn't get the girl so I took her best friend instead, and that wouldn't be fair to Rachel, I really want to keep her happy without her thinking that she's a consolation prize. I like the person she is, and for Brittany i just think that i liked the idea of her being with me because from what i've heard, she doesn't seem like a very nice person. And for now I think I just need a good relationship with someone who accepts me for who I am.

We got up to my room and I told Rachel to wait for me while I changed, I came back and closed the door. Rachel was sitting on the chair behind my desk, with a strange look on her face.

"So your parents are okay with you closing the door?" she asked,

"Yeah? why wouldn't they be?" I sat on a chair and rolled over closer to her.

"Mine aren't okay with that, but let's not talk about that right now." She closed the distance between us and kissed me hard, I didn't notice that she was straddling me until air became important and we broke apart with our foreheads resting on each other.

"You know my mom's just downstairs, and as much as I like to have you like this, I don't want her to walk in on us, and find ou-" She jumped of my lap and went back to sit on her chair.

"I'm sorry, I forgot, it's just that after today I think this, kissing you, is my favorite thing to do."

"You're so fucking cheesy," I chuckled.

"I'm just saying what's on my mind." She smiled and went back to sit on her chair.

"Yeah? well keep doing it cuz it's cute as fuck. We need to talk about who we're going to tell, We don't really have the same friends but if you trust your friends, then I do to."

"That's sweet of you," Rachel had this look on her face, like she wanted something more, she wasn't really happy. Did I forget something?

"-but," There it is. "Do you still have feelings for Britt?" She asked, with a look of expectation.

Here's where i either choose to lie and begin a new relationship with an amazing girl, or I tell the truth and risk losing this amazing girl. And a relationship based on a lie will never workout.

I rolled my chair over to her and our eyes locked.

"Look Rachel, I'm confused. As you know, I've never talked to Brittany but i've had this thing since the first time I saw her and I don't think it'll ever go away, I don't know if you can fall in love with someone just by seeing their face, and hearing their voice sometimes, i've never loved anyone but i know that I would go through a lot to make her mine, yet that's not possible. But then we started talking, and got this feeling that I could have something real but I feel like that's not gonna happen anymore, and I totally get it, I wouldn't either if someone just told me that. I know I said that we should make it official but no one really knows so let's just forget that, I mean if that's what you want." I confessed something that I still was denying myself. Silence took over the room and her eyes fell to her hands. "Please say something.." I needed to hear what she had to say. " I.."

* * *

**sorry? um no, i need you coming back to find out what Rachel is going to say lol, leave a review if you liked it. and thanks for the follows and favorites, i really appreciate it ! have a nice day! **


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